Wednesday 26 October 2016

Treasure

Treasure    
         There once was an archaeologist named Jake who
discovered a rare object, it was a yellow/gold tomb
stone. He gingerly brought it to where he worked and showed his boss, Jeff. "It’s a remarkable discovery,’’said Jeff.They where going to get lots of money about  100 grand. Jake was so happy he decided to search for some more artifacts. Jake started digging and digging and found two more tomb stones that were silver. He was so happy, he told Jeff. They were both so excited they almost peed there pants. However they were gonna get 10 grand not 100 grand. Jake was rich.

5 comments:

  1. you need a comma or a period after it’s a remarkable discovery

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  2. I think you should have wrote It was a yellow/gold tomb stone. But other than that great story.

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  3. Maybe your ending should go like this, they were going to get 10 grand not 100 grand. But Jake was still rich.
    Something along the lines of that I think.
    But it's a really good story!

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  4. i think there should be a comma so it should go like this. However they were gonna get 10 grand, not 100 grand. so a comma between grand and not. nice story.

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